From One Aspiring Racial Justice Ally to Another by Dan Staublin

As a middle-aged white guy relatively early in my antiracism journey, I appreciate opportunities to swap questions, concerns, ideas, insights, and experiences with other aspiring racial justice allies. The more I talk with others on this journey, the more I believe we can help each other do and be better.

Maybe you’re alarmed by escalating racial tension and hateful rhetoric in America. Maybe you regret not being more alarmed sooner. Maybe you feel ill-equipped for conversations about race with certain family members or friends. Maybe you’re reflecting on your own privilege and accountability in a society that centers whiteness and normalizes discrimination. Maybe you want to do something but aren’t sure where to start or how you could possibly make a meaningful difference. Maybe you worry about messing up.

I can relate. I’ve reflected on all these concerns and more at one time or another. I finally concluded that, regardless of how much I did or didn’t do in the past, doing nothing is not an option for me now. Standing on the sidelines and hoping things will get better epitomizes the privilege people like me have benefitted from all our lives. In other words, if I am not actively part of the solution, then I’m part of the problem.

So where to start? I adopted the mantra “Do something” in the belief that one positive action, however seemingly small or insignificant, would lead to another and another and another. With that in mind, below are some steps in my ongoing antiracism journey. If, like me, you are relatively new to this work, I hope you’ll find something of use here.

1.   I got involved with employee resource groups at work.

This was an invaluable opportunity to get to know, learn from, and collaborate with BIPOC colleagues (including women and other LGBTQ+ employees). Our network actively increased awareness and engagement among other employees. We also influenced our senior management to be more visible on issues of diversity and discrimination and help create a more diverse, inclusive, equitable work environment.

2.   I made my Instagram feed more inclusive.Some of the content creators I follow include:

@rachel.cargle, @thegreatunlearn, @adriennemareebrown, @yabablay, @sonyareneetaylor, @becauseofthem, @ibramxk, @ijeomaoluo, @brothercornelwest, @zinneducationproject, @ninaturnerohio, @indigenousamericans,@resistancerevivalchorus, @ajamonet, @alexispauline, @agirlhasnopresident, @che_jim,@the.root, @wearepushblack, @mrcrim3, @afrocentricfilmscollaborative, @newsone_official, @thegrio, @blackwomenradicals, @imaniperry, @roxanegay74, @violadavis, @tgijusticeproject, @jewishvoiceforpeace, @everydayisjuneteenth

3.   I started reading books about racial justice.

There are endless options, but two titles that have been especially impactful on my initial exploration are The New Jim Crow by Michelle Alexander and So You Want to Talk About Race by Ijeoma Oluo. Also highly recommended are How to Be an Antiracist by Ibram X. Kendi, Caste by Isabel Wilkerson, and Dying of Whiteness by Jonathan Metzl.

4.   I started Googling. A lot.

I keep a running list of terms I come across that I’m either unfamiliar with or want to explore more deeply. I’ve done a lot of Google searches, for example: redlining, medical racism, environmental racism, Bacon’s rebellion, racial bribe, Black codes, Tulsa race massacre, Emmet Till, Civil Rights Act, War on Drugs, school-to-prison pipeline, defund the police, white privilege examples, mutual interest — you get the idea.

5.   I sought out like-minded individuals and dipped my toes in the water of collective action.

I talked with a couple activist friends about their journeys and, at one’s recommendation, checked out Showing Up for Racial Justice (SURJ), a national organization with chapters and affiliates across the country that mobilize white people as part of a multi-racial majority for justice. SURJ offers a treasure trove of resources, with many ways to get as involved as you want to, in person or online. I joined a book club organized by SURJ Bay Area and started participating in the chapter’s “Action Hours,” 60-minute Zoom forums during which folks take concrete steps such as contacting elected officials and signing petitions. I found this an easy, non-time-consuming, and energizing way to expand my learning and take tangible actions for racial justice.

6.   I got involved with Racial Justice Allies of Sonoma County.

Through SURJ Bay Area, I discovered Racial Justice Allies, which aims to create a safe space for white people to explore and take responsibility for racism and white privilege. After attending several meetings, I was invited to become a member of RJA’s Organizing Committee. I’m grateful to have been welcomed by this amazing group of mentors, teachers, comrades and friends who inspire me every day to be a better version of myself. We offer a variety of free resources, including weekly readings and bimonthly community workshops related to racism and racial justice.

7.   I’m trying to have more (and more constructive) conversations about race.

The truth is I dread having difficult conversations about race. My heart speeds up. I worry about becoming defensive or shutting down. I worry about not knowing important facts and history. I worry about alienating friends or family members.

“You’re going to screw this up royally. More than once,” says Ijeoma Oluo in her book So You Want to Talk About Race. “It’s going to happen, and you should have these conversations anyway.” So, I’m trying another approach:

• Start from a place of genuine curiosity. Ask questions and really listen, versus just waiting for the other person to finish so I can talk.
• Look for common ground. Remember all people are complex and multidimensional.
• Don’t judge or blame. Remember all people have the capacity to cause harm and do good.
• State my own perspective with any supporting facts or context. Invite questions. Welcome other viewpoints without becoming defensive. Respectful debate? Yes. Heated argument? No.
• If the conversation takes a turn for the worst, leave it. If I caused harm, apologize. Think about what I might have said differently, learn from the experience, and move on.

As Ijeoma Oluo says, “These conversations will never become easy, but they will become easier. They will never be painless, but they can lessen future pain. They will never be risk-free, but they will always be worth it.”

At times it feels as though I’ve barely started to scratch the surface of antiracism and allyship. But I think that’s normal, and it’s ok. What matters is doing something. Little actions can add up to big changes. If you don’t have a lot of discretionary time, a good first step may be reading one book like The New Jim Crow and signing up for the Racial Justice Allies email list or checking out your local SURJ chapter.

This journey is connecting me with amazing, passionate people. It’s helping me recognize the long history of white supremacy in America. It’s enabling me to challenge my own internalized racism. It’s giving me practical tools for confronting racism when I see it in my daily life. It’s teaching me how I can use my privilege to advocate for and stand with BIPOC communities in support of a more just society.

From one aspiring racial justice ally to another, I’m grateful to be on this journey together.